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Evening

From the moment I woke up, my mind was already home with my family and my river.  It took one “tanning bed” session with the ladies at the club (”I get to go home today Girls!) and a two and a half hour drive for my body to catch up. As I came out of the mountains into Lincoln County I was holding back happy tears with the biggest grin my face could accommodate. I’m home!

I had a few minutes to unload my things and say hi to my friends before Dan showed up. He took the afternoon off for some reason!  Lol.  I think he missed me.  We spent a few minutes alone before we went together to pick up the kids from the Play Palace.  My kids were a tad skinnier after I hugged the stuffing out of them.  The five of us sat together at the casino snack bar for lunch.  I just looked from one face to the other with such joy.  I only left on Monday.  It was only the first week. But absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

Dan dropped the children and me off at their favorite park while he made a quick stop at the dentist office.  I followed the little monkeys through the castle playland as long as I was able, snapping pictures of them having fun.  But it wasn’t long before they wore me out.  When Dan returned, he tried to round them up, but they weren’t ready to go.

“Let them play.”

“You look tired.”

I was.  But I don’t want to always be the source of their disappointment.  It was worth the effort to watch them smile and run like all the other children.   I handed Dan the camera.  “Take more of the boy.  I didn’t get enough.”

“Mom, I want to show you something!  Come on mom!  This is cool!”

I followed Brandi to her cool spot and watched her climb through a tight tunnel.  When did she get so big?  Brandi is nine.  Because she comes in a collection of three, I forget that she is older.  When Kelli was nine, she was older.  When Kelli was nine, she stood at the end of the hospital bed as Brandi was born.  I couldn’t hear anything as I pushed except Kelli giggling.  I’ll never forget it.

“Oh mom!  That was the neatest, grossest thing I have ever seen!”

That was Kelli’s introduction to her long awaited sister, Brandi Jean.  And now my second baby is nine.  How did that happen?

Time has no middle ground.  It flies or it drags.  Sometimes it drags until it flies.  This first week of radiation, first week of separation, took forever between Monday to Friday morning.  But sitting here back on my porch (even though my porch moved while I was away), it’s as if I never left.   I am home!

Brandi is once again back on her “normal” and Robbie hasn’t missed a beat.  Jaymi is following me around, swearing that she is not going to take her eyes off me until Monday.

Mom’s home.

After I was able to finally shoo the children off me for a nap, I came outside to get a look at my tree.

“Stand Tall my Sister!  We are Survivors!”

I don’t want to talk about my tumor or my treatment tonight.  I don’t want to talk about how the State of Oregon is not taking anymore adult “clients” for Medicaid no matter the situation. (Seems they are as broke as we are and can’t help us.  Go figure.) I don’t want to think about going back to the city at the end of the weekend.

Tonight, I want to have dinner with my family, take a walk out to the dock after that like Dan and I always do, and curl up with my hubby for a movie after the kids go to bed.

Business as usual.