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Good Sunday Morning to you. I feel much better today. Yesterday was tiring. It was a tad too busy for me and I wasn’t able to write.

I spent Saturday morning catching up with my campground. The friends I have met here are wonderful people. And the friends that I have yet to meet the same. The park is at full capacity. The salmon are late. There is a lot of standing around talking going on here.

The afternoon I spent resting from the social interaction I had in the morning. Getting a much needed nap was harder than it would seem. I was getting the “Hey old lady!” tapping on my forehead from all sides. The kids were starving for my attention. I finally fell asleep in the middle of a conversation and they got the hint. I didn’t expect the fatigue that hit me after lunch. It swept in and knocked me off my feet like a great northern wave.

By early evening I thought I had recovered enough to take Jaymi and head to Wal-Mart. I was wrong. Even as I walked across the parking lot I knew it was going to be too much. The old FibroCreature wasn’t ready to get up and go yet. I climbed in a scooty-cart and “zoomed” on at a breaking .05 miles per hour with Jaymi walking along beside. When we filled up the attached basket, Jaymi went for a regular one and we filled that one too. Mother Hubbard couldn’t go back to the city and leave an empty cupboard behind. Checking out and loading the groceries in the trunk would have been impossible if not for Jaymi’s help. It made me angry to see her work so hard. My kids are going to grow up too fast because of my Monster. I will not be the same after my surgery. They will have to step up and take care of things. I hate that.

Dinner was the special of the day from the Subway inside Wal-Mart. By the time I got the groceries and sandwiches home it was after 7:00. We woofed them down. I was profoundly tired. And I had a low grade fever. I forgot to ask if I should be wary of fevers. That’s on my Monday morning list of questions.

I did try to write along the way, but each time I did someone or something needed my attention. I finally read the entire book I got at the treatment center on Radiation Therapy. About time. I was in bed early, but didn’t sleep until some time after 1:00a. It was a long, painful, tiring day. To tell you the truth, it scared me a little. It’s only the first week.

This morning, however, I woke up feeling much better. Over our morning coffee, Dan and I had a very frank conversation of what if’s. I have no intention of losing this fight, but we have to be grown-ups. Grown-up’s with children to plan for. I wanted to make sure Dan was clear on my desires should tough decisions be necessary. He is my next of kin. These decision are his alone to make. This may be hard for my family and maybe even Kelli to accept. I wanted him to know that if it came to a decision between my leg and a longer life, there was no question I would want the life over the limb. I wanted him to know that I didn’t want to put the family or myself through a life on a machine. And in case things didn’t go my way, I wanted him to know who gets what. Neither one of us wanted to have this discussion, but it was the responsible thing to do. I even took the time to write it all down. That done, it doesn’t have to ever be an issue again.

Then I started putting the groceries away that Jaymi and I bought yesterday. This takes a bit of planning in a motorhome. Boxes have to be tossed and the contents repackaged into baggies. These go into the cabinets over the table. Cans get labeled and stacked on their sides in the pantry. Our large pantry was sacrificed for part of the girls’ bunks - except for the depth of one can length behind the door. I can get an incredible amount of food in a small space. We also have one outside bay for foodstuff that we don’t use everyday. It works.

Dan has been working around the “house” today, replacing screens and building in shelves in the external storage bays. It’s been three and a half months since we moved in to the motorhome and we are still working out the kinks, making adjustments and improvements. By the time we are ready to trade up to a bigger model, it will be just right and we will have to start over. Go figure. We hope to get more out of it than we paid each time we upgrade and in that way inch ourselves into a nice big converted bus. We have even toyed with the idea of “flipping RVs” the way some people flip houses.

While Dad toiled on, the kids and I took a break from chores to have a dance. We had been sharing our ’80’s playlist with the campers around us (whether they enjoyed it our not haha) and the four of is were moved by the rhythm. We moved the tables and chairs on the porch back and cut a rug. The kids laughed at me! Jaymi said it was weird to see “old people” dance. Little stinker! But dance I did. I danced with my kids to the music of my teenage years. It was so fun! I don’t remember when we ever did something like it. And I don’t know when I will be able to dance like that again. I didn’t care who saw us. There was no one else in the world at that moment anyway. Just me and my kids and my husband and the music. Sometimes that’s as it should be and all you ever need.

The afternoon has crawled on in this way. The sun is high and bright, the music is great and the company perfect. I am happy to be here.

There may be a time soon that we won’t be able to stay in the motorhome. While I am relearning to walk, we may have to move into an apartment. Just for a time. Rats.

It’s already getting late and soon it will be time to repack my bags for the second week away from my little ones. Four weeks left. You can to anything for a month. You can do anything for a month. You can do anything for a month. If I keep telling myself that, I will learn to believe it. It’s true. You can do more than you think you can when you have to. They say that God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.

He must think a lot of me.

Tomorrow I re-enter my other life. I think I will walk out to the dock and kick my feet in the water. Maybe a fish will nibble on my toes! Or a seal will stop by for a chat. Maybe I will take Brandi with me. Ya, let’s go with that. Just a mom and her daughter out for a walk.

Perfect.