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I woke up today already doing battle with the monster.

I guess I over did it yesterday. I played Frisbee with the kids and walked around a lot. And last night Dan and I … Well anyway, there really is no such thing as a free lunch, because everything has a price. I woke up late and the monster had already been at work. I am very sore and I hope the wound site is just swollen. But the moment I opened my eyes I knew it was bigger again. There is a rounded bulge where yesterday it was flat. Damn.

When Dr K saw me on Thursday, he said that there was some fluid but that it was healing well. The first open appointment with the Oncologist isn’t until July 10th. By that time . . .

I have the CT scan tomorrow and Dr K will get the results faxed to him right away. If there is a problem, he might be able to get me in sooner. Today, I am mad. I want this thing out of me! I want to say, “This isn’t working for me. I decided not to have cancer after all.” But I reminded myself in time that I have barely just started this fight. And I better cowboy-up.

Sometimes you have to kick YOURSELF in the rear. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on. I am always telling my kids to build a bridge and get over it. This one is gonna take another Golden Gate.

It’s a good thing I have been dumb all my life. My Daddy always said, “If your gonna be dumb, you better be tough!” I am about the toughest person I know as a result. That is gonna come in handy now.

It’s Sunday at checkout time here in the park. The best time of the week. The party is over for this weekend. There will be a few quiet hours before the next party starts pulling in. I guess I will go take a shower, put on some makeup and get ready for the rest of my life.

Oh, and take daddy to his first laundro-mat lesson.

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PS. Turns out that daddy can do the laundry after all. He gets a B++!

Talk to you tomorrow.